Noen som har vært innom denne siden? Fantastisk tørr humor!
GJenoppdaget den i kveld.
Pylon of the Month og oversikt over rotasjonsreting på bagasjekaruseller på flyplasser verden over er blant høydepunktene.
http://www.dullmen.com/home.htmlEt par festlige sitater for å pirre interessen:
"Dear DMC
A groaner for you.
A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After carefully planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.
When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, "Monsieur, that's the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."
(And you thought I didn't have De Gaulle to send this to you [exclamation point removed)"
"I am a card-carrying member of the DMC. Like many of our members, I like
UPS. I have received this email about UPS’ airplanes several times and thought
our other members and readers of
www.dullmen.com might enjoy it.
After every flight, the UPS pilot fills out a form, called a Gripe Sheet,"
that tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft.
The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the
forms; the pilots review the Gripe Sheets before their next flights.
Before you read further, we wish to point out that UPS is the only major
airline that has never, ever, had an accident.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Mechanic: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
Mechanic: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Something loose in cockpit
Mechanic: Something tightened in cockpit
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield.
Mechanic: Live bugs on back-order.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute
descent
Mechanic: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
Mechanic: Evidence removed.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: DME volume unbelievably loud.
Mechanic: DME volume set to more believable level.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
Mechanic: That's what friction locks are for.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
Mechanic: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield.
Mechanic: Suspect you're right.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Number 3 engine missing.
Mechanic: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Aircraft handles funny.
Mechanic: Aircraft warned to: straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Target radar hums.
Mechanic: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Mouse in cockpit.
Mechanic: Cat installed.
+ + + + + + +
Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget
pounding on something with a hammer.
Mechanic: Took hammer away from midget.
+ + + + + + +
It takes a college degree to fly a plane — a high school diploma to fix
one.
The good news is that none of us fly on UPS airplanes. Only our
packages do.
Best regards,
T. Olmsted"
Enjoy responsibly. [8D]
Trenge vel for fakerten ikkje ha nåken signatur heller eg, vel! [
]
